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I Thee Wed Place
Start Here
As a wedding
minister or wedding officiant in the greater Nashville area, I want to help you in
starting to plan your wedding, and in getting the most out of this web site.
Many couples getting
married have asked me, "Where should we begin?" Here are
some general guidelines and
advice that should help you.
Right
after you get engaged, you need to coordinate several things all at the same
time.
You need to get several choices from each category below, and then pick
the single best date
and time that satisfies everyone.
1.
Picking dates and times that are acceptable to all the important people
who must be at your wedding ceremony. This can include parents, bridesmaids,
groomsmen, children, and others.
2. Picking dates
and times that your wedding officiant is available to perform your
wedding ceremony.
3. Picking dates
and times that your location for the wedding ceremony is available.
You can "plot" it as a
time line, with 3 rows stacked on top of each other. Put an "X" in each of the
date/time slots that is acceptable to each party. For example:
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People/Dates |
May 3 |
June 2 |
July 7 |
August 4 |
September 3 |
October 6 |
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1.
Family & Bridal Party |
X |
X |
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|
XX |
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2.
Wedding Officiant |
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X |
X |
X |
XX |
X |
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3.
Ceremony Location |
X |
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X |
XX |
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4.
Reception Site (if different from ceremony) |
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X
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X
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XX |
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The "X's" all have to line
up, like "tic-tack-toe", in order for you to have the wedding ceremony take
place.
As you can see in the above example, only September 3rd is good for
everybody. If you have other
requirements for your wedding, you can simply add
another row below the others. Prioritize them, with
the most important
consideration as the top row, etc. Obviously you must coordinate the
times as
well as the dates.
"Get It In Writing"
Almost every reputable
vendor in the wedding "industry" uses a contract for their services:
banquet
halls and reception sites, photographers, DJ's, limousine services, etc. If you
don't have a
contract with them, you have no recourse if they don't provide
exactly the services you
thought you were paying for. Make sure you also get a
commitment in writing from the person
who will perform your wedding.
Unfortunately, that includes churches, too. "Trust me" isn't good enough.
I
always use a contract with each couple, specifying place, date and time.
The Importance of a "Wedding Script"
I don't know any Bride who
would go to a wedding dress shop, give them a check,
tell them to "pick out a
nice dress" for her, and deliver it on her wedding day at a certain
place and
time. And I don't know any Groom who would go to a jeweler, give them a check,
tell them to "pick out a couple of nice rings" for them, and deliver them on the
wedding day.
However, that is what 99% of the couples who get married do in one
crucial aspect of their
wedding: they tell the wedding officiant to in effect
"say something nice" at their wedding ceremony.
They have very little "warning"
in advance as to what will actually be said at their ceremony,
other than maybe
the vows and ring exchange.
I have heard quite a few
stories about things that have been said at weddings by other wedding
officiants
that the couple did not want said. Maybe you've heard some odd things yourself
at a friend's wedding. Your wedding ceremony should say all the right things,
the way you
want them said, and nothing else. The only way to ensure this is to
have the
officiant provide you a written transcript of the planned ceremony in
advance of your wedding.
(You may consider writing up the ceremony yourself, but
it's a lot of work, and not easy to do!)
No two weddings are exactly the same. Yours can and
should be a "perfect" wedding ceremony,
which says the things you want in a
beautiful and meaningful way.
Getting the Most out of This Web Site
In using this web site, I
recommend that you visit each page and link.
Be sure to read the "FAQ
- Frequently Asked Questions" page. Feel free to send me any
suggestions by email. This
site is the result of the input of many couples like yourselves who
wanted help
in planning a "perfect" wedding day. I hope yours will be "perfect" too. Please
call
me or send me an email so we can meet to discuss your wedding.
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Planning |
Ceremony |
Rev. Abner |
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Please
contact I Thee Wed Place minister officiant:
Rev. Colinda K. Abner
(866) 709-0817
Click here
to ask about Rev. Abners' availability
to perform your wedding, or to send her a
message.
Now available
on Yahoo Messenger and AIM as
itheewedplace
ICQ number is
299474555 |
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